958. - Eddie Huang

[00:00] All right, this episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by Stateside with Kai and Carter, a new podcast from The Guardian. And they are using this podcast to slow down the news and wrestle with the questions that we all have about what's happening in the world. And they do it three times a week. Jason, does that sound familiar to you? We don't really talk about, you know, a lot of international global news items and climates and cultures and sports and things like that. We do talk about fashion and wellness, but for everything else, Kai and Carter are a great place.

[00:30] on YouTube. How long gone recording in progress of beautiful, perfect, actually weather day here in New York city, 75 degrees and sunny outside. Them jeans is in town. I'm sure he's been touching [01:00] Letting people know he's in Dimes Square, pissing on fire hydrants, getting a hot dog at Elbow Bakery, going to Les Dives for an afternoon cocktail. I can't even imagine what you're up to over there. I have not done any of that. I've been in the hotel all day long, just working and stuff. [01:19] I did, unfortunately, go to Les Dives last night for a quick...

[01:22] martini on the corner which you cannot smoke anywhere which is wait what stupid i thought though i thought that shit was lawless that's why people go there no you're telling me that i mean i'm all the all the seating in the middle of the street on the curbs on the sidewalks any outdoor anything even if you're just on a single chair and the sitting in the middle of the street [01:41] No smoking allowed. Klando, the, every one of those places... [01:46] No smoking allowed. You can just get out of your chair and walk three feet anywhere and do it.

But if you can't smoke standing in the middle of a street that's closed off, where can you smoke? And then also the problem is the neighbors are complaining too much smoke. [02:01] We're in the middle of the street. Do you want me to go stand underneath your window on the sidewalk? Well, depending on the way the winds are blowing. I'm not Tiger Woods caddy or anything, but I feel like, you know, depending on how the winds are blowing. But let me ask you a question, and I don't mean to pit our two beautiful cities against one another yet again.

Oh, period. If I'm at... [02:19] Let's say Bar Seco. Just for example, I've got my cowboy boots and my long shorts on. Can I smoke a cigarette sitting on that dusty sidewalk? [02:35] Le Disco, you know, around 945. I think, yeah. Around 945 when the disco gets started? The pink Capris can come out. The Tusi comes out. Once Tim and his boys show up trolling, then you can smoke a cigarette. Okay, I got you. I just don't think there are any restaurants. Like if... [02:55] I guess if it's in America, like New York City, I don't know.

I mean, like I guess parts of the South, and you could still smoke cigarettes at a restaurant, but obviously in the outdoors area. But, you know, few and far between, just like places you can get change made, huh? I know. Wow, we're really uncovering a lot here. Honestly, I've never been to that. I've never sat outside at any of those establishments. When you don't drink, there's not much for you over there after 9 m. You know, I'm going to Dimes for my salmon. I'm going to Tolo for my special French fries.

[03:25] Nothing for you. The only reason to go there is to get more fucked up, do some good coke, smoke cigarettes outside, and get some dick, get some pussy. No, sometimes I'm going to Metrograph to see a Jimmy Stewart movie. You know what I mean? Depending on which print they have. [03:43] I saw it on IMAX. I love that. Aspect ratio. I saw it on IMAX. [03:55] She doesn't know who Jimmy Stewart is. Who does? Fuck you, nerds. Like, honestly, she's bad enough and young enough to let her slide. Like, I'm not happy that she's walking around fucking Fort Greene making out with Joe Alwyn.

She's got Taylor's sloppy seconds, that boring motherfucker. But still, I thought some of the homies had a chance. I really, with her, I was like, one of our friends who's a photographer said he shot her, said there was a vibe. I saw Cooper last night. I was like, Cooper, this could be yours. He said, I know. I just thought maybe she would. This could be yours. [04:25] I thought maybe she would do something cooler, but there's still time for Joe to fumble. Roman's, best restaurant in Brooklyn. I'll give him that.

Good taste. Good taste there. Where do I know Joe from? Joe Alwyn? Dude, literally dating Taylor Swift. He's very good looking. I'm sure he's been in several films and television shows that neither have I. So he's an actor is what he does. Yeah. Because I know his name and he looks like a famous person, but I have no idea what he is known for. [04:55] or anything. He's an actor. He's an actor. But I think that maybe he was in a BBC program we don't have access to. I truly don't know where his fame stems from, but I'm sure it's from acting.

I do know that. Joe, good for you. The days are numbered. Pigeon, you got one strike. Pigeon, look, I get it. Pigeon, you want some A-list dick? I get it. You're having your moment. You know what I mean? Joe ain't A though. In some circles, I think because of his looks [05:25] Chicks are just like, you know what I mean? It's like if somebody bigger hits first, they want in on it. You know what I mean? It's the same. Yes, and you don't mean bigger in terms of back size either.

No, no, no. I'm not talking about big backs. In certain circles. Well, I'm not going to rule it out. But you're talking about more so... [05:42] in fame and fortune and prestige. Yeah, I'm going to say in prestige like that. That's prestige more than a guitar player. That's that's headlining Webster Hall. Chris Black says Taylor Swift prestigious pussy. I'm not saying that I would never let those words, but I saw Taylor. I saw Taylor and and big big back Kelsey on the beach and Taylor was looking good. I got to say she was looking she was looking good and people noticed people are.

I remember I made this remark like a [06:12] different angle with new eyes. And people are also alleging [06:17] She may have got the Yedis done. I think those were always there. I think she's off tour. She's eating good. You know what I mean? I don't talk about women's bodies in that way. Okay, what do you think, Taylor, knowing so much about Taylor Swift, what do you think she was restricting from her diet? Specifically, we have a food guest on today. What do you think? I don't think it was. Can I finish?

Can I finish? What do you think she was eating before that she then stopped during whatever, you know, tour season or whatever, and now she's back eating good? Is there a thing? [06:47] It has nothing to do with food, and that's where you fucked up. That's why I was trying to stop you. This is actually to do with energy expelled. Because when you're doing three and a half hours on stage every night, you're in a deficit no matter what. So she's got more of a sedentary lifestyle right now. You've been to Kansas City?

There ain't much to do out there. The wedding is this summer. We have to get Snatchy on, then. No, but maybe she wants the titties sitting. Maybe she wants some up-up. She said that's what the Colleen Estrada corset is for, honey. [07:17] Yeah, she's in the Eckhaus Lada Mango, skin tight. But what... Okay, so... We're not cutting. Speaking of clothing, I got to talk about... [07:26] actor and pickup basketball player, not Timothee Chalamet, Adam Sandler, because he got flicked up in the denim tears long shorts. [07:36] And I think this piqued your interest in denim tiers long shorts.

Am I incorrect in saying that? You are not. You are not. I mean, I guess an iridescent baby blue kind of nylon shirt. [07:49] basketball short it's a it's a troubling length on the knee and then the logo hit in white on shiny baby blue i i fear that and also the it's just like a normal looking logo and not [08:02] you know, flowers painted on? No, it's the... No, don't worry. It's the logo you can't wear. It's still the cotton wreath. And Adam Sandler definitely can't wear it, but he gets a pass, obviously, because he's famous.

My question is, Jason... [08:15] If I go to the store and purchase these for you, let's say tomorrow, you know what I mean, or whatever. As soon as tomorrow. Well, before you leave town, if I want to get you a little gift, what do you think you'd put large? Or you think maybe medium? It's tough. I guess I'm thinking large. Okay. Okay. I mean, the elastic is there. The length, like I said, is troubling. What if I put them on and the length fits me just fine? Well, that's what I was thinking.

[08:45] It just might graze the knee. It just might graze the knee. I mean, yeah, I would love to wear these, maybe pull up a nice cholo sock, a nice little compression sock. Oh, I see. Okay, I see where you're at with this big bro. I see you're at maybe some chucks, some clean red chucks. [08:59] Low tops? Some clean red chucks? Will you take out the old school on Sunday? The Sandler fit, fool. [09:08] Oh, shit. Happy Madison ass in Glendale. I'm putting the Spang in Spanglish. [09:16] It's something to think about.

Speaking of New York and food, I wanted to run something by you. I just ordered my first Lenwich. It arrived five minutes before on air time. [09:29] And I was able to have a few bites, and it... [09:32] I'm a believer. Hell yeah. Okay, Lenny gang, stand up. Alright, so you had, what is your Lenny order? Did you include chips, drink, and a cookie? Not to go blimpy mode, but just to understand the full order. No. Your fat ass is getting the goddamn family platter. No, I don't get the family.

Fuck you, bro. This ain't 13-year-old fat ass Chris with a Chick-fil-A nugget platter taking down 30. I'm saying that they often, you know. Just one fork. Not four. One fork. What do you mean I need a fork? [10:02] Sorry, just one play setting. Just one mouth, please. Pause. Okay, well, I have my... [10:08] All I need is one mouth. Okay, I got the receipt here. Okay. I've never ordered from Lenwich. I don't know what to do. I don't know what the Len move is, so I'm flowing intuitively. [10:19] With fresh eyes, pure heart, and soul.

One turkey with spinach tortilla wrap. [10:26] Okay. I got to keep it light. We're on the red carpet today. Add cheddar, lettuce, tomato, avocado, alfalfa sprouts, mustard, and then... [10:35] instead of mayonnaise. [10:37] Butter. Oh my God. He's in his fucking bag. Yoli. Okay. I'm in my bag. And then to drink one ice coffee with a side of whole milk and they put the milk in a little mini plastic ramekin. I can pour it in exactly as much as I want. You already fucking know Lenny's coming through. Lenny delivery is strong.

Okay. This is feeling the alfalfa sprouts addition is very, very them jeans and I love it. The butter is a wild twist, something maybe my palate would not understand, [11:07] You're not a creamy lover, you're not a mayo lover. [11:10] But your ass likes eating butter and bread. I'll slather some. Oh, my God. And it's sort of a French thing. There was a restaurant. Hold on. You're telling me that French people put ham and butter on a sandwich? I've never heard of that. I hope you're sitting down. The French enjoy putting butter with their foods.

No, there's a place in Newport called Sissy Bon that Carolyn put me on. Sissy Boy? That's what I call you. Sissy. [11:33] Si bon, as in a si, not a sissy boy. And we got the butter and then brie cheese on it. And then they do butter on the banh mi in Vietnam instead of the mayonnaise. Oftentimes the real heads, no mayonnaise. So butter on a sandwich, it sounds kooky to wrap your head around. No, no, not really, honestly, no. I mean, I see the vision in the sandwich fully. [12:03] bites and you're pleased so far with your Lenny with the offering please so far the only thing I would want to add next time maybe a little more a little more city a little onion maybe a little pepperoncini but okay otherwise we're in a really good place for first first hit pretty cool that you ordered this I'm really happy and I'm glad that you got to try it because I I knew I thought you would like it but it's tough with you you're a tough customer and when I can when I can keep the customer satisfied um I'm I'm happy as well my fat ass hard to please dude I know I said thank [12:33] Don't talk about somebody that's never eight in their life.

[12:36] Okay. We do... Okay. Last night, Maddie and Ricky launched their production company, Super Athletic Film Co. I went to the party last night on the early side. And afterwards, we hit a... [12:48] a bar pity Sunday night and I was thinking about how [12:54] good the bread was there. And I've had it a million times of the year, but for some of the last night, it was hitting hard. And then I was thinking, [13:01] The olive oil is great. Obviously, it's an Italian eatery. [13:04] I wouldn't have minded some butter.

But I feel like it's the kind of place where if you ask for butter, they're like, can you please leave? Yeah, they started making... [13:12] Different hand signs that are very offensive in certain villages. You know, they express disgust. They're doing the Brunson three-point hand, but a little different. I can't believe it. The guy that runs Bar Pitti, an older guy, last night, Alex looked over at him. He's like, it's interesting. That guy's wearing a Chris outfit. [13:42] and silver running shoes. And I was... [13:44] I was thinking next time I go, should I bring him, should I try to create a Bar Pity green Hanover polo and gift it and see what his response is?

You know what I mean? Because his shit was unbranded, so it could have been from anywhere. Was the polo tucked into the jeans? Oh, no. Oh, no, no, no. And it was nice and long. [14:05] It was nice and long. He was... Could you see any curvature of his ass? [14:10] Uh, [14:11] Completely covered the caboose? It was more curvature of the stomach, but there was also curvature of the ass as well. But I was thinking, because he was an older gentleman and he kept... [14:23] I just watched him all night.

He would, interestingly, spend more time at tables that were just attractive females. He's got to touch those ones first, probably, for he has his reasons. He's got to touch those tables first. [14:34] And I was just like, man, I love Italian guys. They can get away with anything. These motherfuckers are out here just... It doesn't fucking matter. He's talking to two NYU fucking sophomores, and it's going well. I'm talking to a sophomore, and it's going quite well. Well, I think... Is Green... [14:52] Their color at PTU? Yeah, they all wear green Bar Pity t-shirts, and he was wearing the polo.

And it is a Hunter? [15:02] It's not quite that dark, but it's also not a Kelly. It's somewhere in between. I didn't have my Pantone book with me to kind of check it out. Hunter Kelly rising. Well, you should be a little more descriptive. Hunter Kelly is one of my favorite gay porn stars, so I'm glad you brought him up. [15:22] and i apologize i apologize i apologize you're right it's embarrassing for me don't apologize to me and take a look in the mirror dumb shit oh that's all i do bro god damn it all right uh our guest is not here yet he's two minutes late um which is very unswagged texas ass tell him to get on here now i don't care how much press he's doing um our guest today friend of the program uh eddie wong who's got a new novel come undone that's that's out soon he's reopened his restaurant [15:52] well i think you went on it right jesse you were on you were on the show with him and his wife yeah i've been on it canal street a fun time we smoked some weed on the pod oh hell no theo von style we don't let that happen here we don't let that happen here um all right but let's let's kick it to eddie because we got to go we're hosting the bear premiere tonight at nine orchard got to get into it with all of our neutered questions um and uh but let's let's let's chop it up with eddie for this is gonna be good we love our fx team we love you guys over there hulu disney plus stand [16:22] you [16:23] This episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by a new podcast from The Guardian, stateside with Kai and Carter.

This is covering a lot of our bases, Jason. It's trying to slow down the news and wrestle with the questions we all have about what's happening in the world. And I know you particularly have quite a lot of questions. A lot of questions, but how often? Because we do this podcast three times a week and that's a sweet spot. How many times do they do? Three times a week. And I have a feeling just based on the platform and these talking points [16:53] stuff than we do that's just a guess the guardian is not some billionaire owned platform they're not afraid to say what they want to say brother yeah rupert ain't sniffing around in in what uh journalists kai wright and carter sherman are up to over there at uh stateside but yeah listen wherever you get your podcast you can watch on youtube it's three times a week and and who couldn't use more news you know especially especially when it's [17:18] when it's not, [17:19] you know, from here, let's say.

Give it a listen. Give it a listen. [17:23] Jason, I've heard you blame being bloated on so many things over the years, whether you were blaming it on getting older or... [17:31] being busy, [17:32] that fucking taco truck you stopped at on the way home from the club i'm sick of this and i don't want to talk about it anymore i think you need to get a clear answer and that's where tiny health comes in okay that's fine that's fine i mean you know as we get older the body can't really handle what you've been doing to it in your younger days and you know that gut microbiome basically affects everything going on in your body whatever's going on in there it controls you know your immune system [18:02] there.

And that's why I plan to take tiny health, the at home gut health test to give me detailed breakdowns of what is actually happening inside my body. You know, sometimes you get sick traveling all the time, we can make guesses, but we don't really know. Tiny health makes it real easy. They've got advanced technology, trusting, trusted in microbiome research, we're getting science backed insights, real data. And we will tell you basically, you know, eat this, don't do [18:32] these lifestyle things and give you real answers to take charge of your health.

Tiny Health is offering Hell Long Gone listeners their most aggressive offer yet, $50 off your first at-home podcast. [18:44] Trial kit at com slash how long. That's com slash how long for $50 off. com. [18:55] Slash how long. Let's test that stool. [18:58] you [18:59] Okay, Eddie Wong's here. We're all in New York City. How are you, sir? Good to see you. I'm amazing. You know, like my body, my spirit has levitated from my body since the Knicks win. I was going to ask, okay, so as a person who the Knicks is their identity and you've had, obviously you've had several...

[19:18] you know, Midwestern white boys kind of try to steal the swag over the last couple weeks. I look at it as a net positive overall. Yeah. Do you, do you, you, okay, so you don't want to hit them with their car. You're fine with it. Yeah. You talking about Wes Wilson? Because he was in the restaurant. I'm not talking about Wes. That's my dog, though. That's my dog. Shout out to Wes. That's my dog. That's my dog. He was here for game four. But, you know, it's funny. That's like coded speak for Wes Wilson now in New York is like Midwestern white dude.

I'm like, oh, you talk about Wes. I mean, he is a Midwest. [19:48] so you're not angry at the bandwagon jumpers you're saying more the merrier yeah [19:53] more the merrier. Like, I think about the Knicks like Chinese food. You want to buy more Chinese food? Like, I got Chinese food. Sure. I agree with you. I think it's like, I think if it fades away, that's okay. I think that all ships rise situation. Yeah. The only people gatekeeping this are like dusty old graffiti dudes that are like, you know, like, I've been a Knick fan since 1981.

When did you start? 1983? You know, it's like, but I mean, that's why people do graffiti. [20:23] Yo, chill, chill, chill. Don't come for our graffiti artists. We have a lot of drug dealing listeners that dabble in graffiti. I mean, all our friends are graffiti artists. Now I'm just talking about our friends. So how did you celebrate this unbelievable come from behind victory? What jersey were you wearing? What were you drinking? What were you smoking? What were you snorting? I did have the cream Jalen Brunson jersey on. I usually don't wear Jalen.

I usually wear OG and Anobi or Mitchell Robinson. [20:53] close it out game [20:54] captain i went with the captain's jersey um i did not wear my cartier scarf that i've been wearing i wore the stone island hat you know hat no scarf um i had the buffs on i had the books on um then by the end let me ask a quick let me ask a quick question though what's the cream is that home away limited edition special edition or is that just a regular the kith original bro you can't get these yeah i think it has something to do with ronnie feig like anytime it's like off [21:24] oh, Ronnie did something to this.

We made this F1 jersey avocado green. Ronnie smeared something on the jersey, and now it's cream. They replaced the Visit Abu Dhabi patch with kith, and it fit. Okay, so it seems like you'd be the kind of guy who would have, like... [21:41] the vintage Sprewell piece or something like that because you want to show how deep the roots go. But, I mean, it takes a lot of balls for somebody like you to don the Brunson sort of, you know, entry-level jersey for this year. Yes. No, that's exactly when everyone zigged, I zagged.

Because for the finals, I started seeing people bring things out that were like, this is my dad's shirt from 99. I was like, I'm not playing this game, all y'all goofy people. I'm wearing the newest, creamiest Jalen Brunson jersey. Pause. [22:11] the creamiest thing you got in this shop. Let me ask you a question, though, because just... If I'm getting your history wrong, I apologize, but you're not from New York, just to be clear. No. I'm not from New York. You're Florida's own. I'm born... [22:26] Yeah, I'm born in, like lived in Silver Springs.

So when I grew up, we were Georgetown Hoya fans. That's how I got to the Knicks. It's like Patrick Ewing. Yeah. One of the best, I would say, drug dealer jerseys of all time is a Georgetown Hoya. That's a classic look. Yeah, Rayful Edmund, you know, like that was the drug dealer team back in the day. We had UNLV running Rebels on the west side. You guys had the Georgetown Hoyas. Yeah. [22:56] towel that i forgot about that that's legendary shit chewing the towel on the sidelines is just that for all my ed girlies out there we just chew a towel and think about spray a little mint tea on there i'm not hungry this shit's tecla bitch okay all right so you so in dc if you grew up in dc or you do you have a connection were you wearing new balance and funny socks and shit i had new balance and funny socks but i left dc when i was 10 i went to orlando okay so like my migration [23:26] Knicks I was always a Knicks fan I thought the city was ill the the Oregon player you know like the fans look interesting it was it was just the flyest team Patrick Ewing yeah I agree I don't disagree with you but Orlando I mean Orlando Magic was a hot starter jacket though yeah in that in that time period like and I fought the I fought the temptation to be an Orlando Magic fan and I felt validated because when Shaq came up after his rookie deal all the people on the radio station

[23:56] Like, he's not worth it. Athletes aren't worth $100 million. People in the 90s were saying things like, guerrilla, like, people on the radio in Orlando were saying crazy shit. And I was like, I knew not to support this fucking team. Yeah, you're saying you were proven right once again. Yeah. I was happy about the Knicks choice. So does Orlando, does Orlando, the city of Orlando now deserve... [24:18] an NBA team? Oh, absolutely not. I had a professor in Orlando, the best thing he ever said. He goes, what's the difference between Orlando and yogurt?

I was like, what? He goes, yogurt has culture. And I was like, oh shit. Oh, that's bars right there. Wow. Good grief. No Danning. The Danning, Danning. Hit you with the fage. Okay. Okay. I had a, I had a basketball question and I'm sure this is something that people have brought up, but I'm definitely a fair weather watcher. I watch it now. [24:48] into it, he's obsessed. I used to watch it when I was younger. [24:51] And I was looking up, I always get annoyed when it turns into a three-point kind of shootout.

The energy and the speed of the game, the crowd doesn't really care when it's just people hitting threes and being lazy. [25:04] Have people tried to cap the amount of three-pointers that you can shoot in a game? No. I think what they did was they just brought the line out further to discourage it. But they still shoot in threes. You got to spread the floor. I looked it up. In 1999... [25:23] Average 13 three-point attempts per game. [25:27] And in 2026... [25:29] average is 36. So it's tripled since then. Steep.

What if we just cap it at 30? 33 pointers and then just because the energy of the game is just not what it used to be for me. You're not a real shooter. I know you're a down low kind of guy. So that makes a little more sense. Get in the paint, bro. I'm a big man. I would agree. I like paint. I like paint buckets. I like defense. I don't mind like a 90-85 game. Casual fan likes scoring. [25:59] when Steph Curry came in. I was gonna say, even I knew that.

Even I knew that. That little nerd. What hasn't Steph Curry ruled? What a swagless guy. Yo, Steph Curry... Don't talk about leaning. It was like the nerd takeover. I feel that from the early 10s, it's just been the nerd takeover. And like... [26:15] basketball culture, men's wear, everything is kind of the nerds takeover. And it was in the Bay Area, social network, tech boom, all that shit. It's all connected. Eddie, if gun to head, would you rock Lee Nings, though? Yo, full disclosure, I got paid to cook the Lee Ning all-star event for Dwayne Wade.

And so I have had Lee Nings on my feet. I can be bought. Nings on the feet? I'm not mad at Lee Nings. Nah. Nah. Who wears Skechers? [26:45] OG? OG wears sketchers. OG, Martha, and Snoop Dogg. Did you see the video of him on Good Morning America this morning just zooted out of his mind? He looked like he was on fucking Mars, just staring into space. So cool. I was like, man, you guys earned this. You guys should all be this fucked up. I gotta say, Lee Ning, it sounds like there's a recurring joke on 30 Rock where Alec Baldwin will say something in Chinese and then people will be like,

[27:15] and he'll introduce them to a Chinese diplomat that's visiting the network. He's like, oh, let me introduce you to Li Ning. And they thought you were saying, I'm leaning against a wall or something like that? It does feel like that. I have never got more fucked up than at the Li Ning All-Star, though, in Houston. Because it was in Houston, and me and my boy went to Smoothie King first, dumped out half the smoothies, poured mad Ciroc into the smoothie, went to cook at the Li Ning event. [27:45] ate all the bows like ti took all the bows to his private area and then i remember ti got all the bows in his section he's a little guy too yo ti took all the bows he's like what do you mean why did you put this chicken in a holder what the fuck is this he just took the tray and then i remember duane wade's marketing person at the time was like do you think you could do a turkey bow i'm like like now and she's like the urban market's really moving towards turkey and my answer again drunk [28:15] market is moving towards turkey roast a whole turkey and kind of break that down into into bows let me go shoot a turkey out back and put it in a bow for you right now do you think they were hoping for like turkey lunch meat like that i get on my lenwich i know she was talking ground turkey she wanted she was like healthy we're moving towards ground turkey i was like i'm i'm gonna need to look this up on the protein shit on the protein yeah we moved towards that

[28:45] Based on what I'm seeing online, I don't know if that ever took off the way that Dwayne's- I ended up in the hospital that night because I was so stressed out, and High Times had given me their edibles. This was the first time that High Times was doing edibles for the cannabis cup. So I eat these edibles, and I'm like, yo, they're not working. Classic thing. I just ate a bunch of them. I ended up in the hospital doing jumping jacks, telling the doctor, I have to keep going. You have to keep going because if you ever stop going, you will die.

[29:15] You just ate too much weed. Like, sit the fuck down. You got 80 milligrams and 18 ounces of Ciroc in your system. You were bugging out. I was bugging. A couple follow-up questions. What flavor is Ciroc? Regular? Coconut. Of course. Of course. All right. Coconut, Ciroc, free Diddy. And then you had- That's hot shit right there, boy. Medibles. How long ago was this, though? Because you're a father. You know what I mean? Yeah. This was a while ago. This was in April. We could timestamp it. [29:45] in Houston, it was either 2014 or 2015.

[29:48] Like, best, worst night of my life. Wait, they had Li Ning in 2014? Yeah, Li Ning's been around for a while. Ancient Chinese sneaker. It's an ancient Chinese... They built the wall in Li Ning, famously. [30:01] When Matt Damon saved China, he was wearing Li Ning's. Yeah, he was actually wearing Li Ning's. Jason, you might not remember. It was kind of blurry. No, I mean, I remember the press run that he did, but I didn't watch the flick. Okay, that makes a lot of sense. Ancient Chinese sneaker. Yeah. Li Ning.

[30:18] They should do Chinese people do this too. [30:26] They should spin it like that. I think it would really work in the marketplace. Okay, so speaking of Asian stuff and sports... [30:36] I've noticed that people are really enjoying in the World Cup that Japanese fans are cleaning up all the garbage from the stadium after every game. And I wanted to ask... [30:38] I feel like it's a specifically Japanese thing. [30:42] That's very Japanese. Chinese people, no. I don't think so. Let me explain what Chinese people would say. No. No, we don't.

[30:55] End of convo. Japanese people are significantly cleaner. They're just sharper. I know. I live in Chinatown. I know. Well, I mean, full disclosure, Eddie, I knew the answer to the question. I was just hoping for it. [31:12] You're saying that the fans who are in America to support their team, while they're coming and going, they're picking up the trash off the ground just to be helpful. Yeah. They bring their own garbage bags from home. And then during the game, they use them as a kite, noisemaker sort of thing. They'll fill it up with air and move it around.

And then at the end, they go in. [31:35] in their section and then pick up all the trash and throw it away. That's beautiful. Honestly, that's once again, proving their culture is superior to ours. That's really nice. If we're going to define stereotypes here, it's like Japanese people, your city is clean. Your environment is clean. Southeast Asian people, your sandals are clean, right? Korean people, your face is clean. Chinese people, nothing is clean. Your money is clean. [32:05] No, I own several restaurants. They're all successful. Okay, that's really good. That's really good.

Thank you for breaking that down. Are you also, as a sports fan, are you following the World Cup or are you divested? As a person who's interested in race, I watched the World Cup, but like the game, not interested. Yeah. Not interested. I don't know if I could sit through one, but I walked by, you know that awful bar on West Broadway, Felix, like the Euro Trash Bar near? Yes. [32:35] carnage, complete carnage. And they have like one TV. It's not even like a sport. It's not Hooters mode. You know what I mean?

They have one TV, but that like 75 flags. Yeah, yeah. So many flags. So many flags. But I think bars and restaurants and no pun intended are eating with this Knicks stuff and the followed right by the World Cup. I mean, the numbers must be through the roof. And also the 250th anniversary of our country brought together by the United... The UFC. Which pay-per-view did you watch last night? Because I know you had people over for 250. [33:05] What did you cook? How many people came over to the house? I did not watch, but I did see homie go, Michelle Obama is the homie.

I was like, bro, what is going on? This is crazy. Honestly, you know it's bad when like, I can't remember who it was. Someone crazy was like, Trump, you got to denounce that. Like Tucker Carlson or someone was like, bro, all right, that's too far. Like we got to stop. We got to stop. But I'm not familiar. Is that guy, because when I saw him, [33:33] How do I say this? Bill didn't look super athletic, but he is a UFC champion. Yeah, he's a bad boy. He is. He has an American charm, that guy.

Yeah, yeah. Distinctly American charm to the band. That's what people are saying today is he has an American charm. We need Trump to come out and just vindicate Michelle Obama and Sigourney Weaver, like once and for all, for everybody. Yeah, yeah, I agree. I think that— And Jamie Lee. Jamie Lee. Jamie Lee, Sigourney Weaver, Michelle Obama. Like, vindicate these people, you know? [34:03] Free the guys. Free the guys. Elon's daughter. Free the guys. I think that the UFC thing, I will say, looked... I wish I would have watched it, but that's not going to happen in my household.

Just from a standpoint... Like, Nomi Fry had to watch it to write about it. It came out today. I haven't read it yet. But she was going through it on Close Friends. Like, I can't believe this shit. I'm like, I really feel like... That's what Close Friends are for. What the hell? Well, I mean, I think that once you write a story about it the next day for The New Yorker, it's pretty clear what you were doing. But I just... I don't want to... [34:32] I feel like I missed out, kind of.

I feel like it was a moment that we all should have watched. UFC to me, like, I got into it when I was a kid. Like, UFC 1, 2, 3, 4. I was like, oh, this is insane. These dudes are mauling each other. Then when people got too good at it and people got really hurt, I was like, oh. Yeah. I don't really want to watch a guy get his legs snapped in half. And, like, this is just too gruesome. I felt like it was, like, as a civilization, a step back.

And then... [34:57] I think when it was the Diagostan guys started coming through and they had like next level jujitsu technique, I got into UFC. And then now I'm getting out of UFC again because it's once again, just like backyard, backyard bullshit to me. Especially when you got boxing there, your first love. Yeah. I love boxing. I don't know. I mean, what, but, but you're saying those guys aren't brain damaged maybe after a few years in the ring or you're just saying it, I feel really is a science. [35:27] science to it there's rules it's more civilized you know but do you think the ufc because the but the ufc thing feels like can you you simply can use brute force to break your opponent's nose with your knee if you want there's some rules that you can't do yeah and there's significant skill to jujitsu like i'm interested in the jujitsu part the striking their skill too but it's just the culture around it feels like this is a step back for humanity no it's a sport for

[35:57] they're going to divide it though they've always had it divided with like like you said like the the peaceful gentle warrior jujitsu guys who you know they have their code of conduct and they're not you know shitty people but then they kind of went and let the hillbillies they let the bakersfield residents the fresno residents pull up and then you know maybe they got a swastika tattoo uh that's currently halfway done being lasered off because they got the deal with venom [36:27] Don't talk about all my white monster homies, okay?

Let's not do that. But, I mean, it does feel like something that started as sort of, not upmarket, obviously, but, like, it did start with their hands a little cleaner, and now it feels like they're in the swamp. It's always been for crazy white boys. Tank Abbott back in the day? No, I know. I know. Yeah, Tank Abbott was the guy that got me into it. Crazy Tank Abbott. I was like, yo, this guy is just, like, my favorite bar fighter. I don't know who that is. It sounds like a Danny McBride character.

[36:57] and I used to see him training every morning on my way to school, the tallest hill in Huntington Beach. I see his fat ass there hung over trying to do sprints up a hill. I mean, I found it in the blockbuster. It was next to kids, face of the death, and WrestleMania. They just put all of the junk cult stuff on a shelf, and I was like, well, I like all these other movies, and I like WrestleMania. I like watching people die in other ways. Let's try this one. Pulled apart by Tiger?

How bad could it be? [37:27] Yeah. I'm not familiar, but who's the one guy that everybody likes, like the cool fighter that's in the Stone Island campaign? Yeah. [37:34] The Cheeto. Oh, yeah. Cheeto Vera. Cheeto's ill. Cheeto used to train at our gym in, too. Cheeto's great. He's like an athlete. He looks to me like an athlete. Like, he's a star. He's, like, good looking. He's cool. Like, I just think there's not very many of those in the sport, which is good for him, I guess. Yeah. Used to be Luke Rockhold, too.

Like, Luke Rockhold was a polo model. He's the homie, you know. Really? Yeah. And these guys, did these guys have the ear thing or no? No, he don't got the cauliflower ear. The hot ones don't have cauliflower. Yeah. [38:04] Get out your fucking wallet. It's time to talk about Rocket Money, baby. I'm trying to save some money. I was talking to a friend of the show, Bryn Walner, yesterday, and she was saying if you look at your subscriptions, you could be living like me. That's what she was saying. She was saying if you use Rocket Money to find out which subscriptions you were paying for without your knowledge, then maybe you could be in Switzerland like me.

You could be in Geneva. You could be at F1. Yeah, it does make sense. I think it really boils down to everyone knows it, but they just don't have the time. They don't want to do it. [38:34] clean all the clothes out of their closet, sell them, and then take that money and buy a dream vacation or a trip to Geneva or a new Rolex. But you just don't do it. You don't have the time. It's too much work. Luckily, nowadays, places like Rocket Money do it all for you. They're happy to do it for you.

So then all that money that you're saving, we can turn that into truly whatever it is that you want. Just make sure that you're not just taking all that money and resubscribing to the same services that you didn't use before. Okay. I've never done anything like [39:04] a personal finance app that helps find and cancel unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending, and helps lower your bills so you can grow your savings. Let Rocket Money help you reach your financial goals faster. Join at com slash howlong. That's com slash howlong. One more time,

com slash howlong. This episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by Squarespace, the dope OG place to build a website so that all of your fans, friends, foes, [39:34] World Wide Web, Jason, we spend all day crawling the web and you see some sites that are shitty. They don't work that well. And then you see some sites that are amazing and work great. And my guess is those are made on Squarespace. Yeah. All the good ones are definitely from Squarespace and also no better place to secure that clever little dream domain.

You know, everyone has that domain name where it is just perfect. It just has to be, get clever with it, [40:04] And also, even if you don't have that website ready or your idea ready, claim that URL, invest in your dream, and then, you know, just sit on it. Maybe one day you could sell it for even more money. And we also have cutting-edge blueprint AI tools to basically use an entire library of professionally designed award-winning website templates that you can then tweak and customize exactly how you want it to so people won't even know that you used that sneaky little AI.

Oh, goddammit. [40:34] com slash how long for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, use offer code how long to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. [40:43] Actually, funny Luke Rockhold story. Our friend Dano, who you know, Eddie. Yeah. He was partying with him, I don't know, 10 years ago or something like that, with the bros. And... [40:55] He put a, Dano put a drink... [40:57] Like I put a beer bottle on top of his head and then had Luke do a spin kick and knock it off.

But he was too faded and he kicked Dano in the head. But he took it like a G because he's a mixed martial artist himself. Also, what choice do you have in that situation? I think you got to take it like a G. I would like to make a choice, but if that happened to me, I would be asleep at the emergency room. Whereas he was able to take it. Did he go to the hospital? Because Luke is nasty, known for his kicks. He took it like a G. [41:27] full, full combat speed, but he was enough.

But Dano, he's got a thick neck. He knows how to take a hit. Dano's ready for it. Jason would have folded like a piece of paper. Jason would have been in the ICU. It would have been. Dan is a real man. I got a lot of respect for Dan. Dan's one of the all-time greats. One of the best things Jason's brought to the table. Oh, I met you at Dano's house, Chris. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Maybe a Super Bowl gathering. That was probably 10 years ago. [41:57] Maybe Chris was not partaking in the ice luge, the Patron luge that day, I don't think.

I think I was freshly sober, actually. I think I was freshly sober. I was also amazed. I was like, wait, so you be wearing shoes without socks? I remember this, because you had loafers on. I was like, wait, wait, so you put these shits on with no socks? And you were like, Eddie, you've never seen a lofer? I was like, I don't wear a shoe without a sock, man. Yeah, they don't make, M. Wesson doesn't make Sprewell, so you were confused as to what's going on. I was like, wait, there's no wheels spinning on this shoe?

[42:27] wait hold on and you're wearing those and one shorts i didn't know you had you have you started wearing socks i mean shoes without socks i can't do it i can't but you'll wear you'll wear slides you'll wear you know that kind of stuff no slot you know yeah i do i do feel like i i do feel like the loafer without a sock is a crazy white boy trait i mean i think that feels like one of our things yeah blood orange might do it that's about it i'm like there's a danger of athlete's foot [42:57] My shit's clean.

I get pedicures once a week. I keep it. Oh, okay. I learned my lesson years ago that the key is the shoes have to be expensive enough to be leather lined. That obviously is fine. And then if you take care of your feet, it's not that big a deal. I mean, obviously in the summer it's not the best, but it's like I just now it makes I get hot if I wear socks with them, I would say. I feel like I'm going to overheat. Yeah, I just need better dress shoes because I have worn a Luggs driving shoe to a wedding before.

I know you have. [43:27] throughout your short life. Yeah. I haven't been invited to a wedding since like, I think like maybe 2018, you know, so it might be the footwear. Well, actually, well, speaking of fashion and informal events... [43:41] I pulled some lines and quotes from the book Come Undone, available in stores this week, I believe. Thank you. Thank you. I wanted you to describe the Burberry baby shower shirt, please. [43:55] All our white listeners, pay attention. Some of y'all aren't from Atlanta. This is the out-of-wedlock staple, right? If you're having a baby shower and you have no plans to get married, you have to get the monogram Burberry polo shirt.

[44:11] Novacek, the famous Burberry Novacek. Yeah, I actually wore it to my own baby shower. I know you did. By my wife's request because she had seen it so much growing up. Right, it just feels right to see the Burberry at the shower. Yeah. Wait, hold on. I don't mean to get into the weeds here, but it's the Oxford shirt, not the polo shirt, correct? It's the button down or you're saying it's the polo? Oh, I see. I was about to say, I like the polo. [44:41] You may be trying to get married eventually.

I think you got to go just like Polo Burberry. Like, yeah, I shot the club up. Yeah, it can't be long sleeve. It can't be long sleeve. It could be long sleeve. I've seen both. I think that you're right, though. The Oxford shirt does feel more formal in its own way. Like you're putting in a bit more effort. Polo is just like, look. [45:02] I shot the club up. I'm taking zero responsibility. Because I feel like when you, did you guys do a fun gender reveal? Like a big bow or something?

I feel like you could have done something really cool with that. Oh, no. We ended up throwing a party. There was no even like mom questions or games. We just threw a party and we had the dudes from Open Market LA. They came to cater it. Yeah, yeah. And then Sandy Sancho Online, she was the food stylist. [45:32] yo, let me just cook with Marco from open market. And Natasha actually stopped me and was like, look, [45:37] I love you and I love your little barbecues. You're going to make this look like shit.

Like absolute shit. I love your little barbecues. Yeah. She's like, I know you're a chef, but this needs to be like feminine. Like you already have like your playlist going on here. Your friends are coming. They're going to get hammered. You have a Burberry shirt. The Henny soaked short ribs have to wait for another time. We can't have plastic grocery bags full of marinating meats lying around on tables and things like that. Chuck English can't be on the grill. [46:07] we're doing this proper. You know, because usually you've seen the barbecue.

Chuck just comes through with like tomahawks just, and it's like Detroit barbecue in the house. Shout out Chuck. That's wow. That is your, I'm glad that she put her foot down. I think that's important. I think it's important. She's changed my life for the better. Jason, Jason has seen this like in real time. Like my wife is really, like Jeezy said, you know, some people buy it renovated. Like she built this shit from the ground up. I was garbage when she met me. I think that women like a pro, [46:37] thing is is a story that is real that that is why that has been said for decades yes it's real it's very real yeah like if you see a girl weaving her birkin with the scarf and putting trinkets on it like she's gonna get a build-a-bear-ass husband yeah you know yeah okay in your book do you is is the first woman that your character is dating [46:58] who is named Samantha with a C, Comantha.

Yeah. It kind of feels like that character is... [47:07] Who you're describing, the person with the Birkin bag? So the character Samantha to me is representative of the type of people I was dating before I met Natasha. Like keeping up with the Joneses, dating by checklist, you got to fit into these things. And I never felt seen in those situations. I always felt like, oh, I'm like checking a lot of the boxes on your checklist and that's why you're here. But like you... [47:36] you don't actually see that, you know,

[47:38] behind that. How were you checking off so many boxes on these usually hand tats kind of take some boxes away. Yeah. For a particular type of Asian woman I was checking boxes. You know what I'm saying? Okay. Thank you. Okay. Thank you. You guys. I mean Jason's dabbled in that field quite often. Dabbled in that field? Actually I think he lives in that field. He's triple platinum bro. What are you talking about? His jerseys in the Raptors. I gotta swim up bar in this pool. Come on down brother. Yeah.

More than dabbling. [48:08] waist deep yeah you were you're you're in the pool swim a bar yeah god damn it but no i think i checked off boxes for like taiwanese chinese women what do you what do you think that what do you think the like is that like business owner are those things that are a little more traditional maybe yeah i think it was business owner i think a lot of it had to do with fresh off the boat to be honest you know so it's like you're saying you're saying dabbling in hollywood success network television success parents like that yeah you got you got some money but you did it [48:38] like a cool creative way not like you're a you know electrical engineer double major yeah you you can hang out you have cool friends big dick it's all there yeah check it off the list yeah there's a plot line on your friends and neighbors the john ham show where his like his like money manager friend who is asian is married to a crazy rich asian and the vibe is like barney you're [49:02] if you don't work for my dad, that's going to be a problem.

Like, did you ever experience that where it was like some pressure to take over some sort of, really, what kind of business was it? Not to take over the business, but I did date somebody who like, [49:18] came from a family that owned like a lot of car washes. [49:21] And that person had a lot of expectations. And like, I did not meet any of the expectations. Sure. They're like, your little shit's cute, but let's talk about suds. How do you feel about squeegees, Eddie? Let's talk brass tacks. Yeah, but basic shit.

Like, I lived in Malibu at the time on a cliff. And like, we had a barbecue. And she brought some stuff, was calling me. I never have my ringer on. Like, the party, you guys have been to my party. It's just going. And she waited 15 minutes or something. [49:51] came up and like started yelling at me and was like, I brought these sodas and I brought this liquor and I can't carry it up the stairs. And you didn't pick up your phone. I'm like, I'm really sorry. I'm going to do it.

No problem. But you don't gotta like, it's not personal. [50:04] yeah yeah idiot like i'm this is this is this is how i you're like i live in malibu i'm an idiot like it's fine yeah you do what you're getting i live on a cliff i have two big green eggs in a malibu like cliffside apartment like this doesn't make sense nothing here makes sense like i had a charles barkley poster how'd you get these fucking eggs up here is the first thing i thought why did you was this just some like [50:27] I got my first check.

Like, what attracted you to Malibu exactly? Because it's really far from everything. Yeah. And you don't strike me as like a big beach guy. So what was the appeal exactly? I wore Tim's to the beach when I moved to LA. Like, there's full footage of me with Tim's on the beach. I believe it. I'm not a big beach guy. What it was was that the vice office was in Venice. And when I met everyone in Venice, I didn't really want to, like, be friends with any of them. Sure. So I was just like, what's the town next to Venice?

[50:57] was Malibu. So I moved up to Malibu kind of just like to not be a part of the whole. When you're putting Venice up against Malibu, Malibu is the obvious choice. There's no, there's no questioning that. Or more importantly, up against Culver City or another nearby town. Yeah. I like went to Abbott Kinney and I was like, there's an Allbirds store out here. I was like, I don't know what to do here. So I went to Malibu and I had seen David Duchovny in Californication. So I got the same car.

I was like, I'm gonna get a yellow Porsche [51:27] You had the yellow Porsche. Okay. Not to be a pocket checker here, but... Don't make him say Boxster. Don't make him say Boxster. No, no, no. I'm not. No, no, no. I know it wasn't at 9-11. Don't worry. I can't drive a stick shift, so I was just like, you get a Boxster. I guess what I'm asking is, what's the rent looking like in Malibu for a bachelor pad at this point in your life? Okay. This was like 2014... [51:51] I think my rent...

[51:53] Just different sizes? Yeah, because I was like, you know, sometimes you want to do brisket in one, and then you want to do, like, pork, like, ribs in the other. So I was always just, like, doing two styles of meat. Pause. You know, I've been talking about this a lot because the Big Green Egg was something that I grew up with because my granddad had one. And I always, I didn't know what it was as a kid, obviously. I thought it looked cool. Why, someone like you, I feel like you're the guy, I wanted to powder coat one, like custom color.

Yeah. Which I feel like something maybe you would have done to match the Porsche. [52:23] was like seven grand out there. Oh, that's not that crazy. No, that's not crazy. I was chilling. It was chilling. I found a deal too, because it was like a fifth floor, like walk up the cliff, but I loved it. You could see dolphins out there and no one, like no one was knocking on my, there was no Jehovah's Witnesses up my ass. I was like, this is great. Sure. You were living free out there in Malibu.

Yeah. Fifth floor walk up in Malibu. Yeah. That's the most New York choice of all time. Yeah. What is the, okay, so the big green egg, why two? [52:53] you know what I mean? Puerto Rican flag or something like that? Yeah, oh, that'd be nice. That'd be very nice. I should have gotten Hector Laveau airbrushed onto the big green egg. That would have been the most fire thing ever. I've never seen a custom big green egg, and I don't understand why, because it feels like a great surface to customize. I feel like there's a company somewhere in Indiana that'll do college team logos on your egg.

Yeah, you can get a Bulldogs logo or a Confederate flag, but they won't do anything else. [53:23] Nick people and be like yo I'm gonna give you a thousand dollars to Hector Laveau yeah it's like it's like it's like when Cheeto did the fucking removas you know I mean it's no different it's no different yeah oh Dr. Wu come draw the spider you know fire I got a doctor the Dr. Wu big green in terms of ceramic temperatures being reached there's a little you know we can't just use any old paint [53:43] I hate to be a stickler.

Dr. Wu, big green egg is really fucking funny. That's crazy. Wu's going to tax your ass for the egg. Yeah, I'm going to need that. I'm going to need that. Put it in the bag. Put a fucking Cortez on that egg. That would be the most funny Taiwanese shit ever. It's like, I got the Dr. Wu, big green egg. I feel like you're really leaning into these Taiwanese stereotypes, and I don't think that I'm that familiar with them, honestly. I don't know what the stereotypes are. I mean, obviously, you're very clear.

[54:13] I think that'd be helpful for me just as a novice. I think, okay, Taiwanese mother, like when you say Taiwanese mother to like Chinese people, it's like when Jewish people are like a Jewish mother. You know, there's like an unspoken like, oh, your mother has mentally tormented you. Your mother demands a lot. Very interestingly, a lot of the stereotypes that American white people have towards Jewish American people