952. - Chris & Jason

All right, this episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by Stateside with Kai and Carter, a new podcast from The Guardian. And they are using this podcast to slow down the news and wrestle with the questions that we all have about what's happening in the world. And they do it three times a week. Jason, does that sound familiar to you? We don't really talk about, you know, a lot of international global news items and climates and cultures and sports and things like that. We do talk about fashion and wellness, but for everything else, Kai and Carter are a great place.

All right, so who couldn't use more news? Listen wherever you get your podcast. or watch on YouTube. How long gone? Chris and Jason coming to you live from room 810 of the Londoner. We're in beautiful London. Actually, it's not raining. Wait, when do you leave, motherfucker? Friday? People are going to know. People are going to be knocking on the door. You said, bring them. There's 14 doors to try to get here. There's 14 doors to try to get up here. Please, by all means. Okay. By all means. Okay. Yeah, but it's not raining, and we have a pretty good view, so hopefully we can get some action outside today.

What kind of action are you looking for today? Just like walking down the street without an umbrella is all I'm looking for. Yesterday was like the worst possible weather for me. Either I want a full day of rain where you just lock in and it's shitty, or I want a full day of sun. The in-between doesn't work for me. Well, I hate to nature-splain you, but you know. Raining every hour for a few minutes is not, that's not what I want. You know, when in London, I don't really mind it.

Dude, I hate it. Just fuck it. Fuck it. No, because you can't get around on the bike. When it's raining, you can't use a bike. That's the real issue. Do you want to bike somewhere today? I mean, I would like to bike a lot of places to get around, but I mean, if the tube strike, I didn't check it out if the tube strike is still happening today. I don't know. Or if it's them saying it was just, it was Wednesday and then off Thursday and back Friday seems strange to me, but I'll look into it.

The tube strikes happen as often as Hell and Gone is released, I think. It's a pretty common occurrence, and it's happened to me several times, which feels, I mean, I'm not here that much. You've been struck in a pond? Yeah, there was a two-hour drive back from River Cafe once that was one of the longest. It felt insane. Oh, yeah, I remember that. It felt insane. But whatever. We had an insane traveled drive home yesterday. We're recording, and... on wednesday morning when we would normally be releasing the pot so sorry for the the lateness but we were shooting all day and yeah we drove we drove home from a beautiful manor uh just 70 miles outside of town and then you know we we were in the sprinter heading back you know fell asleep for an hour this and that and then pull up the google maps and we're you know we're still very far i really try my best this is something that happens in new york too when you're coming back from the airport i'm like i can't look i'm not gonna look i'm not gonna look i'm not gonna look i'm not gonna look and i look and it's always it's never good news i've never looked and had good news it's always bad news when i look and i try to learn my lesson but yesterday i was like the can't be this only took an hour and a half in the morning i realized i mean that's why we're kind of exhausted even though You know, we weren't digging ditches.

We were just influencing and being on-camera talent. But, you know, we spent five hours in the car yesterday. That takes a toll on the body, especially our large bodies. Deadass. I'm trying not to get in a car for the next day. I'll do anything to not get in a car. You want to do anything but sit today? I can't, dude. I cannot sit. I mean, my body feels okay because I worked out last night. I worked out this morning, but I can't. I cannot. Okay, so Chris Black topping all day, Wednesday, June 3rd.

And also, speaking of, happy anniversary, baby. Oh, wow. Congratulations. Today's my motherfucking wedding anniversary. It's crazy to have your wedding anniversary during Pride. This makes you make me think a little bit. You really, the cover-up is, you took the cover-up far. You said, what about a June wedding? I don't think anyone would suspect that. When I marry my woman, my woman wife. When I get married to a woman that has a body that is a woman, I swear to God, I swear to God, it's going to last. I mean, it was a very straight sounding voice you just used, but one of the gayest sentences ever.

I'm trying to have a happy pride to all those who celebrate. Happy pride to all the brands scrambling to activate. I can't wait to see the mistakes you make online. I think that's what people are discussing is that brands. in 2026 are just kind of like, we're not really, we're not really going to activate so much, you know, not a lot of rainbow. Okay. Avatars on the, on the social media profiles. Not a lot of, I was hoping to go to Equinox and be able to get the unicorn tear smoothie for pride month that comes in a full, full flag colors.

I'm sure there's a lot of tear based smoothie offerings here in London town. What was the one that we saw yesterday? Addison health with an F. Like no T-H-F. I took a picture of it. A-T-I-S-X-H-E-A-L-F as in Frappuccino. So it's Attis X Health. Attis is a... I do like it there. And that's like... It's like a sweet green type of thing. It's a slop bowl spot? Yeah, it's that type shit. Is it Gen Z slop? Is it Boomer slop? Is it Millennial slop? Which one is it? It's probably Millennial. Okay.

Let's ban the word slop from this podcast. And it's not A-T, like the Mexican... Well, not... We're in London, and it seems to be a British-based business. British. I could be wrong. It could be Spanish or French, but from what I've eaten there, it doesn't have any of those flavors. What does atis mean? Do you think it's a made-up word? It's one of the worst names for anything I've ever heard in my life, so I don't know. It sounds like a bike chain company, but you can get a salad there.

It doesn't make any sense. It's a financial consultancy in Los Angeles. It is a learning... military company no i don't think the word means anything i think it's a word that was come up you know an underpaid staff member automatic terminal information system but i don't think yeah at the restaurant it's called powerful food which i like yeah yeah not a bad not a bad podcaster who needs power but i i've eaten there several times it's pretty good it's pretty good and it doesn't have the i mean sweet green we got to pray for our brothers over there because they're doing some video what was that video we saw the rap video who went there to make the rap um like

Remember there was like a video where somebody comes in to make the rap with them. Yeah. To learn how to rap. I feel like it's somebody we're friends with. Yeah. It's not coming to me and I don't want to throw shots into the dark. But I like, I want to say something quickly about raps as a person who enjoys them but has never made one. I do think rapping is very hard. I don't, like I think that getting, I think actually rapping. We're talking about. I'm not talking about Auntie Jay-Z freestyling.

I'm talking about putting the ingredients in the tortilla and then wrapping it tightly, but not too tight, and getting everything in there so that it stays consistent form until the very last bite. I'm just saying it's hard. You've never done it before, though. No, I've never wrapped in my life. And I watch the wrappers, and I see them do their thing, and there are methods to it. There's different ways to do it. I'm always impressed. At the speed and the veracity to keep the ingredients inside. The dexterity. You would agree that it's not the easiest thing to do.

It is not the easiest thing to do. But I would say wrapping wrap ingredients with your wrap versus wrapping wet soupy beans in a tortilla. Easier. It is much easier. But also, Chris, you have years, if not decades, thousands of joints and blunts have been rolled. That's true. And it's the same exact biomechanics, but on a much smaller scale. So that's like you started out. I started harder. Okay. And so putting a kale Caesar inside of a tortilla, that should be. I agree with you. It's been a long time out of practice.

Plus the beauty of a Swisher was it holds a form. You know what I mean? With backwoods or something more wet, it's a little harder. With a swisher, when you crack it, it kind of holds its form. Rolling papers... Like a hard shell taco. Exactly. Honestly, yes. Yeah. A Swisher's a hard shell. Like one of LeBron James' hard shell tacos. Exactly. Taco Tuesday is coming up. But I think that that is, every time I watch a wrapper, especially when it's an overstuffed fat boy wrap, oh my goodness. You're like, there's no way that's going to fit all of that into that.

Literally every time. Is this whole thing going to fit? And then it does. Never sleep on the structural integrity of a gluten-free green tortilla. But it's really impressive, honestly. Because burritos, you're right. Obviously, the hot. ingredients make it much harder you know i mean much harder there's wetness it's gonna it's gonna fuck with the format yeah and when you get to the bottom of a burrito which i've done i mean jesus you know more times than you've gotten to the bottom of a martini glass it looks like you know it can be it's not more times than you got to the bottom of a pussy hole sometimes the bag sometimes the bag sometimes the bottom is not as good it's you know it's that's where the water goes to pool Do you know what I mean?

So it's a little tough. Boy, the salad, not a problem. My man getting physics on it. No, because it is just, I watch them do it, and some people are so good at it, and then when you get a bad one, it's just like, this is pointless. Put it in a bowl. You waste my time. Leaky wrap, that's fine. A leaky burrito, and we have una problema. No, a huge problem. But I will say, because of the deep history of the Mexican culture, they've been doing that since... I would expect them to be better at it.

I would expect them to be pros, because they've done it. It's truly... one of their greatest burritos are kind of technique i mean it's debatable on the origin of it but it's it's kind of a more of an american thing than a mexican thing they're taco only not only but i would say like primarily really there's like lots of other tortilla based yeah yeah sure you know what are they rolled the tortas the vampiros Some of them, yeah, like a little enchilada. But in terms of like getting a big fat burrito, like your definition of it, it was kind of a Mexican-American thing.

Obviously, they have them now, but their burritos are not like the deluxe Grandes. Oh, I knew that. No, I knew that. Anytime I've had a more traditional burrito, I know it's not Chipotle, fat boy. Chipotle is so disgusting. I don't even like to think about it. It's so disgusting. What's disgusting about it? Every single thing. Because people have... The entire user journey is flawed? It's literally McDonald's, and people have chosen to look at it differently when it's not. It's just like this is low-grade. fast food because it used to be something it used to mean something and the quality of it has diminished so much mean something just like mcdonald's but i i sure on a shorter scale but i'm i'm saying that chipotle getting hung in the rafters of some of these more quote-unquote high-end fast food establishments that you and your ilk i when they have a hangover want to post on ig it's just a different i'm sorry it's a different you know i don't i'm i'm an active chipotle

I'm just wondering why I'm catching a stress eat though. I'm just saying that your type of person who gets hung over and has like a bad boy meal. I think Chipotle is, is held in the same hallowed halls as fast food. That's considered quote unquote good. Now, like a in and out Chick-fil-A, you know, that area where I think Chipotle as a person who's eaten at once in my life is several rungs below those establishments. I think it's a case-by-case basis. You're saying location-based? Yeah. They closed the one. They replaced the one near me in LA with Trejo's donuts.

So I don't even know. I don't even know where to find a Chipotle at this point. Danny Trejo. The goat. Some of them. I mean, he's fallen off more than Chipotle. The real talk. Real talk. He's not killing people on TV and he's making donuts now? He used to be so chingon. He used to be the badass ass guy. Had the coolest chest tat. Bitches on him all the time. And now he's like, I make vegan gluten free donuts. He's a little too Esteban Oriole coated for me. Like low rider.

Like, I don't know. Just Mexican in general? No, I think it's... I don't know why I would trust him with donuts is what I'm trying to say. You know I trust with donuts? Like a fat guy from Chicago. That's who I trust with donuts. A good-looking character actor that looks like he's going to kill you is not who I'm thinking. You're right. I'm not going for the, oh, it's vegan month with the pumpkin. I'm not looking for that. My pumpkin spice churro bites are back, but not for long. Have you ever tried one of his donuts?

Fuck no. I bet they're better than we... I bet they're... That... I mean... I bet they're fine. I mean, it's a donut. Donut fine. I leave donut... Donuttery to the Cambodians personally, but you know... Are they the best artists? They're kind of goaded in the donut space, yeah. In LA particularly? Yeah. Oh, okay. Like they own the shops, like those more traditional shops in the strip mall. It's part of the Cambodian immigrant story. Damn. So I could go get a cinnamon twist from one of those motherfuckers? That's right. I mean...

No matter where you are, like, there's a donut shop near me in Glendale. Like, open 24 hours. You know, like, every donut costs 85 cents. It's just, like, exactly what you think would be old guys scratching lottery tickets in there at 2 in the morning. You know, 11,000 Armenian high school kids with, like, Goyard iPad cases. You know, just like screaming at each other, riding little electric bikes. But it's just like a Cambodian 14-year-old girl who's like, what's up? How can I help you? Here you go. Bing bang. Interesting. There's a documentary on it.

Oh, wow. I'm not that interested. I'm not that interested. It's available on American Airlines. When I have that new Calabasas show on Netflix, how can I watch anything else? You're going to burn through that super fast. I'm already burned. You're not going to ration it out. It's really actually, it's not as depressing as the Valley because they're not like... 42 and divorced and fat with kids there's still some hope in their eyes they're they're hot you know what i mean it's like hot influencer chicks that like went to calabasas high and the whole premise is they're like we graduated from college and we're like figuring our next move so we moved back to our parents house basically but also that's what every 22 year old in the world does now yeah but when they're when we're back from michigan state but when when feasibly they could just like get an apartment that somebody else pays for and not have to do that they don't want to do that but the lead the lead girl one of the lead girls who's clearly been you know helicoptered in and plopped because she's like friends with the biggest influencer that's a real cast member is i mean apparently kid cuddy beat drake beat so and there's a guy that's a fake sober cowboy that's one of my favorite tropes This episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by a new podcast from The Guardian stateside with Kai and Carter.

This is covering a lot of our bases, Jason. It's trying to slow down. The news and wrestle with the questions we all have about what's happening in the world. And I know you particularly have quite a lot of questions. A lot of questions, but how often? Because we do this podcast three times a week and that's a sweet spot. How many times do they do? Three times a week. And I have a feeling just based on the platform and these talking points that they're maybe going to be covering different stuff than we do.

That's just a guess. The Guardian is not some billionaire owned. They're not afraid to say what they want to say, brother. Yeah, Rupert ain't sniffing around in what journalists Kai Wright and Carter Sherman are up to over there at Stateside. But yeah, listen wherever you get your podcasts. You can watch it on YouTube. It's three times a week. And who couldn't use more news? Especially when it's not from here, let's say. Give it a listen. Give it a listen. Oh, this is huge for me personally. This episode of How I'm Gone.

It was brought to you by TaskRabbit. Oh, baby, let me tell you something. This is not a joke. I use TaskRabbit a lot because I can't do anything. You need some art hung? TaskRabbit. You need a fucking something put together? A cabinet? Got to reach that cheese grater on the top shelf? TaskRabbit. Anything you need, TaskRabbit can take care of it for you. How it works, TaskRabbit connects you with skilled taskers in your area. They can help you move. They can assemble furniture, repairs, yard work, mounting, and more. You can search for a tasker based on cost, skill set, availability, and past client reviews so you know exactly who's showing up and can have confidence that they know what they're doing because taskers have assembled over 3.4 million pieces of furniture, completed 700,000 home repairs.

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So book trusted home help today. That is $15 off your first task using promo code how long with the TaskRabbit app or at com. What the fuck does that mean? Guy is hot as hell. Went to rehab. Now he's like, yeah, I'm more of a rodeo guy in Malibu. Chrome Hearts hoodie with the cowboy hat and the toothpick. No joke. He took his chick to, what's that bad sushi restaurant on the hill? Yamashiro. He took his chick to Yamashiro. Bro, that's where you go on Love Is... Not Love is Blind on...

Bro, they broke up. On the autistic show. They broke up at Yamashiro. She was like, I can't do this, and left because he was trying to... Well, I mean, yeah, the food is shit there. I mean, the views are good. I didn't think they had eaten. That's the whole thing. So there's a Malibu Cowboy. The best character to me is Scotty. About halfway through their wasabi espresso martini, and she said, this just isn't working. And then there's Scotty Pippen's son, who is, I mean... If you're Larsa Pippen's son, you have to be gay.

And he's pretending to like this hot Pilates instructor. And they kissed once in high school. And I'm like, bro, I don't think that... The other interesting thing about Larsa Pippen's son... I met my girlfriend at hot Pilates. I'm very straight. Every... time he's on camera he's wearing russell westbrook's clothing brand honor the gift which just feels something's going on there because no one's ever worn honor the gift ever in public like i've never seen that i've only seen it at selfridges i've never seen that in real life they're opening for pierce the veil it's very show me the body coded but i don't know so anyway if you if you've watched the show i'd love some feedback it's really even alex was like this might be too much for me like they're they're like having a beach day it's supposed to be laguna it's very Like Laguna Beach is back is the vibe they're going for, but it is, it is depressing.

Okay. So all of these people that I'm assuming they come from money. So it's not like we're trying to figure out career and income stuff a ton. It's more of just like having a lot of fun this summer. My best one, my best, the best one is the hot influencer girl. who is like she's with her dad and she's telling her dad's like immigrant story of him come you know like him busting his ass and making it and then him being supportive of her being an influencer because it's like well this bitch has bought a house so like i get like the vibe is like yo you're making money i'm not gonna hate this is real i can't hate on you this is i can't remember her name i was picking avocados at your age you would like her actually i'll send her her profile i would like to hear more reasons i just think i just think you would like her I was just thinking you were like her.

Give me one clue. She's not Asian. She's something, but she's not Asian. She's not Asian. She is something that is not like me. I'm going to find out what you are, bitch. You ain't Asian, but you something. No, but it's a classic. When I was on my hell flight day from Penticton to New York, I was able to put down five episodes. From Penticton to Schenectady. I want to talk to you about this, actually. I sat next to these two people. Unfortunately, we're on Alaska Airlines. It's the only way to get home.

Don't fly Alaska Airlines if you value comfort. I hope to not. I will say that Alaska Airlines has a thing in the seat back, because they don't have TVs, that it holds your iPad and phone perfectly at eye level. That's smart. I want to say that's nice. They have those in some jail cells, too. It's nice. Yeah, they had to build it themselves, but it's still nice. So I'm sitting next to this couple, and they're clearly like dorky tech world. They're coming from Vancouver. They're flying into New York for tech week, probably.

Actually, literally. So they get on. The guy's got two salads, sushi, and a green juice. Okay, for the two of them. And he purchased this from the airport in Vancouver? Yeah, he's getting on the plane. He's getting on the plane. Vancouver Airport, unbelievable airport. Beautiful. I remember clocking that info last episode. Gets on the plane. Gets on the plane. He eats the sushi, drinks the green juice. They eat the salads throughout the flight. But the weirdest part, every time the cart comes around, she gets orange juice. It's nighttime. She gets orange juice.

They start watching. a sort of video game-looking Batman choose-your-own-adventure program on an iPad together splitting headphones? Where you choose what happens. These people look normal. They're wearing bad-ass leisure and shit, but they look normal. How old? Like younger than us by far, like early 30s. She's got a big rock on. They're clearly engaged. They're doing well in the tech space. Bro, she's got this going on. Then on her computer, it's the most type A producer chick psycho checklist for their wedding. Psycho. Like font so small, I can't squint and read it because there's so much shit on the screen.

And they have the worst. It's the ugliest shit. Like I see her going through this stuff. It's just the ugliest after the worst photographer, worst flowers, worst food. Like it's unbelievable. Then the guy, okay, so she's doing that. Okay, so there's two screens open. One of them has Choose Your Own Adventure Lego Batman game. I honestly have never seen a program like this. It looked regular. It looked like a TV show, but it wasn't a cartoon because it looked like a video game. And it was Choose Your Own Adventure? They would push buttons and shit at certain times.

You're not going to find this, bro. This is too deep. This is some shit I don't think we have access to as regular people. Like, I don't think they'll let us. He's giving too crunchy roll. But so they're doing this. She's on her wedding website. Then I kind of zone out for a bit. I look over. The guy has got his computer clamshelled. Like, open but closed. He's running cloud code. No, no, no. I don't know. He puts on these glasses. And he's doing his work on the. Like he's typing on the keyboard.

The clamshell is touching his hand. He's viewing the screen from the glasses the whole time. But they're not Apple Vision Pros. There's some shit that his company gave him that we don't have access to. So he's able to do this special work, but nobody on the plane can see it. But my vibe is like... He's watching JOI vids. That's what I was going to say. Because I was going to say, if I could see this guy's screen... I'm not going to understand what's going on. So maybe he's worried that someone is stealing his code is the possibility.

But why not just get the screen? I see people do it all the time. Just get the screen privacy. He looked insane. I know. Insane. But I remember when the Apple Vision Pro first hit the scene and I was sort of fantasizing being on an airplane and editing the podcast or something where I'm able to just sit up and you can have your head in any direction. You don't have to sort of be like, You don't have to give your neck a hump. Yeah, yeah. And, you know, have a nice big display of everything that's going on.

I understand all of that. I understand all of that. But, yeah, I mean, obviously there's a lot of things that sounded good. You know, like I was excited when you could type horizontally on the iPhone. I was like, oh, I have a giant hand. So now that you could rotate the phone. You're like, now everything works out. And then you try to type horizontal on the iPhone and it just feels wrong. I don't know what. I guess I'm just at a certain point. obviously we're more concerned with our outward appearance than we should be i'll take the l on that but i don't know what to the point at what point are you like yo i know this looks crazy i should probably not do this do you know what i mean like are there is there a point where you're like you know what like i know this is a little more efficient but like It looks so crazy.

I'm going to have to talk about it because people are going to ask me in public. I think there's nobody in their life holding them accountable. And when they are out in public, especially on a plane or something like that, it's just all bets are off. No, I know people behave. I know that. And I know that. But I think everyone in their life does the exact same thing. So they don't know. that it's wrong they don't think that it's wrong it was unbelievable unbelievable thing to see truly damn i mean like every time i looked over both of them there was a new thing happening that i couldn't believe i was like this is unreal this is happening right now well i wish the the happy couple a great wedding it's gonna be awesome i can't wait to hear all these people both make a lot more money than us so i don't feel that bad for them you know

Yeah, but their food and their soundtrack and their candles and their table skipping is going to be fucking stupid as fuck. It's going to be absolutely awful. Yeah, so I guess this is our second pod of Pride Month. Not a lot of Pride action happening in London. i mean i guess when we go back to la or or new york it's gonna it's gonna go down um on the on the flight over here i was able to sleep for the first i slept for like five hours on a flight i think for the first time in my entire life really i don't i think it was maybe my sleepy tom gummies but well that would help but you've done that before yeah all the time yeah that's what i don't know but it It still has blown me away that I slept for five hours.

I went to bed at nighttime and I woke up after breakfast was being served. I want to talk about this because we both flew British Airways. British Airways. And I'm always, I took a day flight for the first time in my life, which the day flight from London to London, which is what some people recommend. And maybe I'm on board now. I don't mind it. But the difference was, and I did take some, I slept because I didn't sleep much the night before. I didn't wait. I usually wake up. When that nasty metal food smell starts wafting through the cabin.

Metal food. Disgusting. And those, oh, I feel like jail. Didn't smell anything. And I'm wondering, I know they serve food. You just reminded me of night orange juice. Where's this? Jesus. Night orange juice. Especially airplane orange juice. That's just sugar. That doesn't even count. That's an orange juice substitute. Might as well be drinking one of your pineapple Kool-Aid buckets. Who here? Is anybody listening? Let's put it. That's what we call that. Cliffhanger in the biz. I don't know. I just don't. I'm glad that you were able to sleep. So this was the first flight on British Airways where...

I've only flown British Airways within Europe. I've flown it from Stockholm to London. Because I wasn't really feeling the menu. And I did something I've never done in my entire life, which was I ordered salmon. And it was cooked well. And it was pretty good. It blew me the fuck away. I don't know. So I'm eating salmon, which is something I would never do on an airplane for multiple reasons. And then on that same flight, salmons are flying by your seat for a couple hours and you don't smell nothing. Maybe it wasn't.

Maybe the menu was different. Maybe because of the time of day, the service was different because we left in the morning. I would say that. historically breakfast food less offensive smells than lunch or dinner food. If I'm... Yeah. Right? I think so, yeah. Okay. I mean, you know, depending on how much you like the smell of baked beans, roasted tomatoes, and sausage. Well, I guess bacon is the most gnarly smell on earth. But they're not doing that on the plane. When's the last time Alex whipped up some bacon in the crib?

It's been a while. But I'm out of town. She's probably doing it every day. Sizzling up. She's probably doing it every day. The neighbor's complaining. Like, wow, it really smells like bacon. It smells delicious, though, if you like bacon. I think I get that a quick... I get that it smells good, but living with it, I think, feels a little... Is it only the smell, or is it knowing that there's a thin layer of bacon underneath? No, it's only the smell. I don't think about that. I don't think about the cleanliness because somebody's going to clean it.

You don't think that there's a little bit of bacon on your items? Well, not until you keep pushing it. But no, I've never thought that much. A little bit of bacon on your items. Would you like to add bacon to your item for an extra $3? It's more of a thin layer. You can't eat it. It's just kind of a thin layer. Yeah. As soon as I got to London, everybody wants to talk to me about the World Cup. And I have to explain to every single person that we don't care about the World Cup in America.

or sort of actively making fun of it and hating it, and people don't. We care about it because it's going to be an inconvenience to our lives because of traffic and people talking to us about it. I guess. I mean, I don't think the World Cup will affect my life whatsoever. It will affect. I do think it will affect traffic in New York. Maybe not LA, but I think it will be annoying. I mean, it seems like. The World Cup is a good way to show the world that America is sort of losing, just in general.

I think we're fine. I don't mean in terms of football scores. I just mean in terms of infrastructure, stadiums, future growth, architecture. It's because we don't care. The only reason anybody cares about the World Cup here is because it's an opportunity to make money. From whatever. And we don't have communism, maybe. From a city standpoint, you get tourism, you make money. From a brand standpoint, you activate, you make money. There's no passion for football. There's a passion for making money the American way. Yeah. That's all anybody cares about. I'm just seeing all the, we're getting stadium mogged by third world countries.

Well, I mean, the only stadiums that are big enough in America are college football. Like those are the biggest, my guess is those are the biggest actual stadiums that exist compared to. And they were all built in 1947. Yeah, but I don't, when I went to the LA, when the new one in LA, one of the worst experiences I've ever had in my life. Like this shit looks like a spaceship. No one can tell me how to get around. Like this place is a fucking nightmare. So you're like a little bit older with a little more good bones.

I just think a classic SEC football stadium is going to feel better than a Dubai soccer. stadium just to me with a with a robotic yeah roof and uh yeah it's just it's the way that like wimbledon feels better than anything new because it has the history but i i you're we are getting stadium mogged but luckily that's something i think we can recover from yeah we about to recover from it yeah um have you when you get back to new york are you gonna to are you gonna try a david scoop shop ice protein ice cream definitely not definitely i mean i'm curious to try the david canned cod fish david shawty's slide into the dms bless me with some cod i'm still upset audrey hobart collaborated with fish wife but that's something audrey we love you but we can't be doing 10 fish we uh you know everyone they get a couple mistakes no i get it if it's a you know what if you're truly passionate about 10 she probably only got paid in fish too just like like a like

Like you work at SeaWorld. She does have great hair. So it could be, it could be, maybe this tin fish is doing something for her. It's really funny to the idea of getting paid in fish. Like you're a sea lion. You're fucking having to put it together for the tin fish. I've been trying to eat more tin fish lately. Dude. To diversify my team. There's some things that are healthy and I get it, but it's just, it's, oh, there's nothing grosser to me than that. Like choosing that as a meal at home feels extra psycho.

If you're on a boat or you're on tour or you're in jail, I totally get it. But if you're at your house. This is a BTG food for you. Boat tour jail. If you're at your beautiful home with a well-equipped kitchen, you're like, hey, babe, let me get some Triscuits out of the cabinet, and we're just going to bust open some tin fish from my local purveyor. I just feel like something. It feels sinister. I do it. I mean, I agree. I agree. It's sort of like eating astronaut food when you're not on the spaceship.

I don't have it as my meal meal. I'll have it as an in-between snack. Just like a small bowl of white rice and then dump out the tin of sardines up on there and then just eat it really quickly like a rabid wolf. I would rather not eat. I don't want to do it either, but I'm doing it to get all the fucking nutrients and all that. I'm just starting to think it's a... I'm sure you're getting the nutrients, but at what cost? Think about how your mouth smells after that.

Think about how hard you're going to have to go brushing your teeth, flossing, tongue scraping to get that disgusting flavor out of your mouth. Mackerel? What are you? What are you, a fucking whale? I've been eating sardines, not mackerel. Whatever. It doesn't matter. Same def. It doesn't matter. And how much is it? Like 20 bucks. No, no, no. I mean, some of it is very expensive, but the kind I'm eating, you know, five bucks or something like that. Okay. I just, look, do you, man. And I mean, look, you look great.

I'm trying to bulk. You're never going to bulk. You cannot eat enough to bulk. What does that mean? I mean, my body's not built to bulk. My doctor was like, the protein shit is stupid. Doing that much protein is actually impossible, and it's not going to work the way you think it is. 200 grams of protein or whatever is just like, you're just going to feel bad. You know what people are afraid of? Exercise. Everybody wants to do everything, but just exercise. Well, I'm also exercise. No, I know you do.

I'm just saying like, if eating 200- Like doing a red light mask and making sure you hit your protein goals is not going to change your entire life. Yeah, like you're going to feel better if you exercise is all I'm trying to say. What if I have a vibration plate that I do every morning while I stick my tongue out for 40 seconds? Is that enough cardio? I wake up at 5 m. and do my 100 lymphatic jumps and then go back to bed. So I get it. I mean, I'm not like above it.

I'm not above it. Yeah, I mean, I'm trying. I'm just, you know, I'm always experimenting with my body. You experiment too much. I think you need to lock in and just stick with it, man. You're old enough to lock in. Lock in and stick with what, though? Dude, I'm telling you. My tastes are ever-evolving. My desires change daily. That's your problem. I think what we need to get into, I think we need to start washing our face with bar soap. I think we could go back to Cro-Magnum and be better off.

I really believe it. Okay, so I'm going to chew on a piece of cinnamon bark as my toothpaste. I'm not saying that. I'm using beef tallow as moisturizer. I mean, that's the most disgusting Joe Rogan shit of all time. I know that works, too. I think it's like everything else. Everything works if you decide that it works. That's what I really think. I think in no world does everything work for everyone, so the placebo effect is all we can actually depend on, me included. I just like the idea of what would happen if I just ate the amount of food that a 6'9 person should be eating.

Because I never had that big of an appetite. But you can't exercise enough for it to even out. That's the problem. To eat as much as you're supposed to, you have to probably train like an athlete for it to actually level out. What if I train like a bad athlete? No, look, I've played a couple years in China, but I'm not, you know. What if I train like a chill athlete who's just kind of like not into all the... My sport? Tough to say. I just kind of go wherever my body takes me every morning.

And sometimes that just means like laying on the ground and just like feeling that. That is... People really be doing shit like that. Like, well, I just listen to my body. Well, maybe don't. Maybe listen to somebody who knows better than you. Well, I'm trying to get all those to eat all that food, but have it be... So there's no room for anything but just whole foods. And I'm also trying to eat no sauces. Just like a bowl with plain rice, steamed vegetables, and some chicken or whatever. It's only strange to me because food is one of your only joys besides drinking and drugs.

So I'm not saying you need to be the sauce boss and fucking slather. I get it. I just want to see what happens, but I haven't been able to eat 200 grams of protein every day at not even close. I also don't think people realize how long it takes to see, quote unquote, something happen. It's going to take six months to see something happen. It ain't going to take two weeks. I know. I've been doing it for like a month or two. No, no, I'm not saying. I just don't think that there is a...

I think all of these things are... I just think it's going to be diminishing returns. But if it makes you feel good mentally, you know, if it makes you feel good, even if that's a trick, then it's fine. Oh, I don't feel good at all. Well, I never feel good. I'm never happy. I never feel good. Those are the two things you got to do. That's baseline stuff. No, I mean, you feel happy when you're like, when you just finish a workout or something. Yeah, I mean, I feel good right now after a full night's sleep and a workout.

Yeah, I feel good. You worked out this morning already? Yeah. Oh, fuck. Yeah, I was pretty busy down there. I'm doing that after. It's pretty busy down there. I'm going to go that classic 11 m. slot. Yeah, that's the let shoot slot. Yeah, I'm free today. No, no, I'm good for 2 o'clock if you are. Yeah, I'll be there. I'll be there. I'll be around. It's the best time if you can. No, I disagree. I don't like an empty gym. I like to be in there when people are in there.

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Yeah, I like waiting for machines. It sounds awesome. I like hearing fucking... dudes who hit their wife going... I mean, the grunting shit is crazy. Luckily, I don't experience it. I don't go to places that really... There's certain places I think that kind of encourage that and other places that the vibe is not right. Because I think people are realizing that men working out and making those grunting sounds, it's like a subconscious mating call. Oh, I see. For pride. Women are also attracted to men. It's not just a gay thing.

I don't know if women are attracted to men who, I mean, women who drive trucks and live in fucking Florida are attracted to men who grunt. No, no, no, no. I think it's like a mating call of like, I want to hear the sound of a man like maxing out his pull-ups. This is one of your wildest. I think it's, I would say most women are like, you're disgusting, shut up. Most. Yeah. Women hate a muscular guy showing how strong he is. No, but showing how strong you are and sounding like a bitch because you're grunting are two different things.

A grunt is not... Grunting and bitch activity are two different things. Grunting is not manly. It's actually pussy. Because if it's that hard and you're doing it... I think the sounds that come out of your mouth while you're on your 70th push-up, it's... No sound is allowed. You shouldn't be making sound. If you're a real one, you don't make sounds. Okay, okay. Some people are allowed in the bedroom. Some people aren't. Chris says he likes a silent environment. That is not. No talking till I'm done. What? And some people like a...

A gym is not a place for noise making. You don't drop weights. You don't grunt. None of that shit is acceptable. I really believe that. You're with other people. Get off my lawn, ass. You have to respect the environment and the surroundings. When I hear a guy grunt, this happened recently. There was a guy grunting on the treadmill, and there was a woman and I flanking him, and she was just like, shut up. Dude, shut the fuck up. Grunting on the treadmill is psycho. I mean, if you're grunting because you're doing your 14th one-handed push-up, then like yeah finna come no gym we're in is it no one's doing that really that's the thing those kind of places are like that any any any set that you're maxing out you know anything that where you're pushing it to man man brushing learn how to breathe properly and you'll be fine okay this is big coming from mr nose strip who you need to grunt now all you think about is breathing that the fuck i'm not i don't want to grunt when i'm in the gym i'm not trying to make a sound sometimes it comes out And I'm like, okay, I'm clocking myself, making a grunting sound.

I think you like it. I think it's when you feel the most masculine. Because when you're eating your sardines and plain rice, I know you don't feel like a man. So you've got to get it out. If I eat it with my bare hands, I feel a little bit more. I forgot to mention, I do eat that with my bare hands. Nature's spatula. It makes it a little different. I think the difference being... If you're on the treadmill and you're grunting, you're sort of doing it consciously for attention. I would say sprinting on a 12 hill on the treadmill is hard.

That could require a grunt if you're that kind of person. I think when you are a person who's working out, and I'm sure when women be grunting as well, there are a subsection of Italian men who are into that as well. If you want to see a woman grunt, you're going to look at a meatball. That ain't the kind of... Nah, bro. I'm looking to see a woman grunt. I'll tell you, you know where I saw the women grunting? A gym in Philadelphia. Let me put that into perspective for you.

Yeah, I was wondering what's the most female grunt. They're ripped. I mean, they're buff. Okay, I think the difference, I think there's a true grunt, there's a real feel, and there's a fake grunt. I think when you're grunting and it's completely involuntary. That's when it's okay. If you're in the Olympics, yeah. If you're in the Olympics. What if you're training to be in the Olympics? If you're a professional athlete and you're at other professional athletes, by all means. If you're an amateur at the gym and you're going hard, you should pat yourself on the back.

You should be proud of that. The grunt. to signal that you're doing hard stuff is not necessary. I'm saying the grunt is not a signal at all. It's simply an exhaust pipe on a car. You're putting your foot on the gas and the F-150 is going... 75% of people who grunt in the gym, performative. I'll give you maybe 20%. We are the 20%. We are. I wanted to talk about a new... The T in LGBT stands for 20. I wanted to give you an update on a new celebrity couple and how they're rolling out their relationship because I think it's an interesting...

It's a new couple? Jacob Elordi and Kendall Jenner. They were in Santa Barbara, but now what they're doing... And Jay Lee was talking about this on Instagram yesterday. They're in Japan together and they're taking photos with the owners of all these... cool Japanese restaurants, and that's sort of them hard launching on Instagram. That's the hard launch. Which feels like a genius move. It's an omakase launch. It's an omakase. It's 300, but it's good. It's eight courses. Okay. But is this something that you think that they're... consciously and actively like this is a plan or this is just the way that the i don't like i don't like to go jason mode and think everything's a plan i don't like to go joe budden mode and think it's all a conspiracy i'm i'm not thinking but you just said this is a launch so that means it's a concerted effort versus two or three images circulating one from a pizza place very popular so i don't i don't know if it's if it's a pr move or if they're just having fun and letting loose but it's a genius way to do things

And also, who is going to say no to an adorable, sweet, mild-mannered Japanese small business owner? Who just gave you the greatest pizza of your life. Yeah. Just a long-haired, groovy Japanese guy who's like, hey, you guys are awesome. You mind if I take a pic? It's so different. No one can say no to that. No one can say no to that. I think they're doing it in the right way. And it's only on the Japanese restaurant accounts where the entire caption's in Japanese. yeah i mean that is cool but i think it's something that they're maybe not trying to do and it just came out and it happened i don't know if they're trying to have a launch or maybe their team is trying to i think i think that it feels like a thing where if it was bad someone would tell them to stop on there you know what i mean i think if it was if it was someone from fucking you know idpr be like okay no no no no more of this so it's like somebody from their team is like Maybe room service today.

Maybe we don't need to go out. But look, Kendall Jenner, one of the hottest in the game, not being the lesbian charges. Jacob Elordi, legendary stick man. It's good for everybody. Okay, so he's a beard that can put in work? Yeah, exactly. And by put in work, I mean pepperoni and a margarita. I can put them down. Okay, well, on the subject of food, let's discuss pineapple Kool-Aid, Christopher. Bro. I want to say, I don't think I was first on this. But my algorithm was hitting me with this a couple weeks ago.

Same, honey. And it's gotten to the point where I have to make one. As soon as the plane touches down back in Los Angeles this weekend, I will tell Vic, my driver, no, no, no. Stop at Ralph's Fresh Fair. I need to pick up a few supplies. My question is, what are they serving it in? Because it doesn't look like a normal pineapple receptacle. It looks like a... Because it looks to be a jar. I would love... For you to explain what a standard pineapple receptacle is. Standard pineapple receptacle. Plastic.

Squarish. You know, rectangle. And then you pop the top. Clear. Okay. You know what I mean. Don't act like you don't know what I mean. You bought more fruit than I have. Well, I don't buy pre-cut. Unless it's a beautiful Libby's. You're going to cut a pineapple? Well, I'm just saying. So, this is what they're doing. Some people are making it fresh. and storing it in a glass jar, but most people are buying this pre-cut pineapple spears in the jar. I've never seen pineapple spears in a jar. I haven't seen it either, and I guess some of these young entrepreneurs are picking up some pallets at Costco.

Yeah, this could be some Southern shit we don't know about. This is at grocery stores we aren't welcome in. Yeah, so basically you get a jar. of pineapple spears. I guess it could be any pineapple. It could be chunks as well. It could be chunks as well. And I want to also know why don't we just use pineapple juice if we're just going to be drinking this. But you get the pineapple, you take the spears out, leaving the syrup, and then you add in white sugar and Kool-Aid packets, stir it up, and then you sort of brine the pineapple spears.

Are we electric blue or red? Are we aware how long? What's the marinade time? What's the marinade time? I don't know. Because on the hot Cheeto crusted nerd rope wings, I feel like that's what I've been seeing. Have you seen that stuff? I've seen it, yeah. I was talking to my barber. Shout out Kevin. Last week I was getting a haircut and there's a Mexican spot that's in my neighborhood in Glendale. that's a very fish out of water and they have a lot you know the hot cheeto you know samplers and things like that it's like instagrammy torta food and he's like i was explaining it to him he's like oh hell yeah is that the kind of place where they have like micheladas with gummy worms coming out of it and i was like precisely actually yes yeah i i would like to try your version of the pineapple spears but the i mean i think it's going to be mods but i think if you don't know that's the thing i think i know i think it would be i know you want to do a high-end version which i like some delicious magna powder mixed in sounds like a wise plan the magnet the magnet team actually you know what i do i have to make a libby's video maybe this is this is tom where i live out libby's if you're listening i need a i need a palette of pine so they would love they would love for you to live out

They're going to be like, we're paying you to do this. This culinary delight that you've created. When you do this, especially if you're doing a video, you have to dress like a southern teenage baseball player. Like the star of that big goo. I have to dress like that big goo? Yeah, which means several bracelets, fitted hat, straight, which this wouldn't be your first time wearing it. Sir, no, sir. I can put that look together with my suitcase downstairs. And then what brand of wireless headphone is sitting on top of the hat?

Oh, does he have the ones that go around your neck? No, no, no. Just like a JBL wireless headphone that's sitting on the top. Oh, like backward. Like a Roman crown. Does he have one on? I think so, yeah. Okay. I would guess. Long sleeve under armor, baby blue. you know i would guess i mean slides and socks i would guess something shitty as far as the headphones go um definitely not apple or beats i would say go for the The Bang & Olufsen? No, he didn't get the... I like JBL.

Yeah, JBL makes sense. $79 Johns. But I feel like some of those trends, I feel like... In the gray color. Southern high school baseball stuff is really crazy. Like the look, they all wear like necklaces and bracelets and like the hair. It's a bunch of 12-year-old white boys who look like plies. Well, they have that haircut, you know, the fade with the front. That should be the new wife beater. Like now that we are not allowed to call the white tank top a wife beater anymore, that hairstyle should be called the wife beater.

They got the small glasses are called speed dealers in Australia and parts of New Zealand. And then having that haircut, that sort of hockey hair, rapist haircut, a little chug. What do they call it? There's a name for it and I'm forgetting it right now. That's a wife beater. There's a name. There's already a name for it, but it's not very fun. because i get videos also served me where it's like old guys like with crazy hair going in they ask for that and they get it and they're like oh hell yeah i'm like you look insane yeah like when you're balding and you get that haircut and you push it all forward it's just it just it makes you look like um there's that one maga white rapper who has like the really fucked up yeah yeah yeah you kind of look like that do you remember baby gronk of course you know he kind of

The energy of like an eight-year-old boy who's dressing like a guy who has a lifted, you know, construct, like my cement company, 350. I actually do pretty well. Got neon all up in it. I've been pouring for a while. Take my car on, dude. I'll give you a quote on the pool. You got to do that. But the thing is, I also would always buy chunks of pineapple, not spears. Yeah, I think the spear thing is new, just like the pickle. Well, they're also doing alcoholic versions of this. Don't tell me they would drop a little hen in there.

Not too much. I'm not sure if it's hen or if it's some tequila or something, vodka. I mean, it could be anything, right? It could be anything, yeah. Because mixing anything with Kool-Aid is good. As well as pineapple. Yeah, true. Tequila, vodka, it all go down just nice. The things I'm learning, it's showing, you know, it's shining a light. It's putting a magnifying glass or a microscope to different subcultures. Like we get to see a young white baseball playing kid who talks more like plies than plies could ever imagine. You know, stuff like that.

I'm learning that many of America's obese youth. He's not obese. I'm not talking about him. I've seen lots of other videos of fat kids eating this. And many of them are like, I ain't never had pineapple before. This is their first exploration into fruit. I think that's a good thing. They're going to be disappointed because it ain't going to taste that good. This is not fruit that was, you know, picked off of a tree and served to you at the peak ripeness. Well, it was picked off a tree at some point.

It ain't no wiser farms. But, I mean, you're eating, you know, a canned fruit. Publix fruit. Publix fruit that's been sitting in syrup for a few, sitting sideways in syrup for a number of years at this point. Sitting sideways. So I'm learning that many of America's fat children are not consuming. Of course not. Yeah, but, I mean. You assume that they're just eating processed foods or fast foods or chicken nuggies or whatever. You assume that's happening. And then every once in a while, their parents will make, back when we were kids, eat your green beans or peas or whatever.

They gave up on the fight. Yeah, dude. No fruit. No. Fruit is gay. And then the other thing I'm learning, many of America's people who eat every single day, it's arguably their best skill and what we're best at. Their ability to use a fork is not bad. I've seen some very interesting fork usage in these videos where it's like, what do you... Men, women, and children. It's like when people write funny with the pencil. You know what I'm saying? It's like, dude, what are you doing? Somebody hands you a bowl of fruit and a fork and it's like a dog looking at like a...

looking at a dog looking at a chessboard and you're like all right bishop to c12 and you're like oh no it's there's and they're holding this fork i mean obviously you know we're sort of one of the last generations where you know etiquette and cotillion you know like we're not we're not sending our kids to like go learn table manners nowadays it's kind of a free for all Every kid knows how to use chopsticks or does not know how to use anything at all. I still get a fork. It's the destruction of the middle class of children.

I get a fork at Nobu, so I don't know what you're talking about. You get a fork at Nobu, and you probably do an overhand grip. The overhand grip from a child is fine, I guess. It's more... But then once they get the fish on the line... There's a difference between a child and a 14-year-old. But once they get the fish on the line... There's still weird behaviors. Because this is the first time they're skewering a spear of pineapple. They can't get it to their mouth in a way that looks normal.

And it's like, dude, it's just pineapple. Sure, it should be cut into pieces. It's a long spear. But this is what I'm going back to about saying this is the first time they're navigating. I mean, we're not asking this 400-pound eight-year-old to climb up a pineapple tree, cut it off. Hack it down. Hack it down. Remove the... the rough skin, core the center fibrous bit out, and then consume it from that point. We're just saying, hey, this thing's ready to go. All you got to do is get it out of this bowl and into your hole.

And these kids are like, bro, I can't. And also, this is only men doing it. Yeah, it's only men. What's up with that? Well... I think also not using the hands is because they know it's so sticky. It looks sticky. They would be better off using their hands, obviously, for embarrassment purposes and for just getting it in your mouth. But then if you get your hand in there, it's a sanitary issue, cross-contamination also, then your hands, that'd be blue. Yeah. And the bitch is referring to the first three fingers on my head.

I'd have one bite of fruit. My finger turned blue. This is crazy. That'd be blue. I look like Smurf. So I'm dying to try it. Obviously, I'm a pineapple lover. Me too. It definitely tastes good. I mean, there's no question it tastes good. It's just disgusting because of the amount of sugar that's in it. To make Kool-Aid taste good, you have to put an amount of sugar that would give you gout. I don't know. I mean, I have a... I'm able to enjoy drinks with a low amount of sugar. No, no, I am too, of course.

I'm just saying, I think that... I know what you mean. It's just like here, you came this far, you know, I'm going to make french fries at home and I'm just going to do like light salt. Yeah. No, no, no, it's crunchy. If we're going to do it, we're going to do it. Yeah. Don't have popcorn. And don't go to wine and eggs and get some weird sugar. Don't go to some weird shit. What is the cheapest, what is the shittiest grocery store in Los Angeles? i guess like super king or something like that you got to go to super i mean you need to go i mean you need to go to like get like dollar store like domino sugar value no no no like great value shit that makes domino look like nobu okay i'm talking about like when we were kids and you just say like sugar yeah yeah yeah yeah you know like but like great value something like that signature series what was the name of this what was the name of this grocery store again

Super King. You need to go to Super King. Super King, bro. You need to go to Super King. Get all the ingredients there. Oh. You can't get the ingredient. Don't. Because you know some dumbass. The Yugoslavian Kool-Aid is better. Because they don't have as many chemicals. As soon as we finish this podcast and open our reels, we're going to get somebody to be like, I did the pineapple spear trend with ingredients from Erewhon. Come with me as I make a $78. Try my Hailey Bieber pineapple blue spears. There's no question somebody's done that.

Okay, so they go high, I go low. No, you're not even going low. You're going right. Not in that way. I just mean like you're going right. I'm moving correctly. This is the traditional way that this dish is created. You're respecting the heritage of the dish. And that is the right thing to do. A taco, a burger. It's like when those chicks opened the taco stand in Portland and got canceled. You know what I mean? It's because they didn't respect the heritage. You have to respect the heritage. Yeah, it has to be made the correct way.

It can't be a Portland-based female-owned lesbian taco spot. It can't be no jackfruit shit. No, no jackfruit. It can't even be a fully Mexican-owned restaurant. That's like a fancy spot. Yeah. And like, here's our taco that's served four ways with this blue corn tortilla. That's this has to be, you have to go side of the road mode. That's what this is. You got to go side of the road mode. And I, you need the same thing with blue spears. You need to find a kid that can eat it though. That's the question.

Pause. You need to, you need to find a kid. You could, if you're going to do it, you can't be the one trying it. I have to go. You're right. You can go stand outside the middle school. Creating this dish. is only half the battle, if not a quarter of it. I have to, me, a giant man in his 40s needs to go around with candy to my local schools and then offer them these treats while I film them. We must know someone with a kid who would volunteer to do this.

Oh, yeah. I know, yeah. All of our parents out there, let me come film your kid for a while. Yeah, it's nothing crazy. Just that big gas. Nothing crazy. Lauren, let me get Fritz over to the house. I'm going to give him his first blue spear. Fritz will do it for sure. Fritz is still a little upset with me. I think Fritz has had a sip of wine since they've been living in Paris. That's my guess. Oui, oui. I bet he's had a little fizzy, chuggable red. Dan's like, a little sip's fine.

It's a different culture. Mama. Another Galois. It tastes so good with croissant. Mama. Yeah, this is all. I like that we, I think we've gone a little too far into like peptide wellness trends and things like that. And we, we sort of deserve blue pineapple. I think it's, I think it's a reaction. I think it is a reaction. The pendulum has swung and I think it, I'm glad that we talked about this and we worked out some of the, the possible pitfalls in this journey because. And the culture surrounding it.

I would have tried to do like, I'm going to make my goop kitchen, the Gwyneth version of it. We don't want free-range pineapple cups. And also, for our parents out there, I'm not going to make alcohol ones for your kids. Of course. I'm going to have them clearly labeled. Okay. The ones with alcohol will have a smiley face on it with a star. Yeah. And that means kids stay away. Got it. Got it. Got it. Got it. Okay. Okay. Good for me to know, too. Because I would hate to have a sip of the...

If your little badass kid comes home smelling like Henny... It ain't on me. That's your fault. That's why you can't let him go to public school. Yeah, and I've been filming your kid the whole time. I got it all on tape. Try me, bitch. I had a camera on for this just to make sure everything was above board. I've got a camera strapped to my chest to feed alcohol to children at a local school. Come with me as I get arrested by Glendale PD. Come with me. GRM, gruddy with me.

All right, I was thinking lastly about, you know, conspiracy. No, not you. not you tinfoil tj tinfoil tj i got a i got a good one so we've got everything now is sort of we we went from like subscription based like we we don't have commercials anymore we have spotify netflix hbo all that shit so we don't have to do ads anymore and now they're like but also we have ads too and if you want to spend even more money we'll remove those but also if you want to have cheaper

Or maybe even free services. You can watch a lot of ads. We're going to dump ads in and you're going to deal with it. And people are finding out that that is making more money than just paying for the subscription. You know what I mean? So I'm wondering at what point will we have ad-supported medicines? So like peptides that got different peptides in it that make people do other things. Like you're going to get free Reda, but... you know this company is going to put a little pow pow in here so the red is making you lose weight but this one over here it's going to be like this one makes you want to go to las vegas or this one makes like a board of tourism gets involved a board of tourism any type of thing that people are trying to sell you know like yeah no sure this is going to make you go to the store and buy cheerios multi-grand it's going to make you go buy churros multigran but then you know peter teal is going to be like this frio zempic also has a little bit of peptides in it that makes you you know hate brown people i think that's not i don't think we're that seems like a pretty far technological advancement i know but i don't think i think people would be willing to do anything for frio zempic i think people would be willing to do a lot even though zempic's pretty cheap from what i understand i mean i don't think it's free is free though Free is free.

Free is free. This is not one of your best. Look, I don't know. Craving, this is going to be the future of how we make people. We don't have to sell things to people anymore. We inject. I like us saying this as a podcast that has as many ads as you can possibly fit that people complain about all the time. Nobody complains about it to me. I've never heard a single complaint. They complain all the time. No, they say, TJ, another great round of ads. Wow, I like that you guys care so much to try and make them unique, interesting, new, and fresh.

I've literally never heard feedback like that ever in my life. I haven't either. But I've also never heard any negative feedback. There's way too many ads. I've heard it several times. I'm like, what are you supposed to? This goes back to my usual, like, well, fuck you. This is free. So I could have you paying $5 a month. Well, the thing about podcast ads, not like ads on YouTube or whatever. skip it fast forward there's a button that's 30 seconds you go boom boom boom also every every podcast ad it's usually like 90 seconds two minutes three minutes for the ad break hey siri fast forward three minutes okay now you're getting into ai territory as usual i can't we don't use siri over here it's series the cops if i'm working out i've never used siri in my life if i'm hands free you know i'm picking up a dog shit i'm doing whatever and then squarespace come on while i'm listening to my stories Boom.

Hey, Siri, fast forward three minutes. Boom. Never use Siri in my life. Never voice to text in my life. It's narc shit. Narc shit. Siri, that is the cops. Okay. Well, this is a nice jumping off point to leave our How Long Gone listeners today. Stick around for the next hour on Patreon, and we're going to really dive deep into what Chris thinks. We got a guest today on Patreon. Chris Brown coming through. Hey. Siri Dunarks. If you pay 30 a month, you get the extra. Yeah, all right. Thank you for listening.

com. Thank you to our value retail family. Had a blast at Bister Village yesterday. Bister Village. All roads lead to Bister Village. We'll see you. Well, Thursday night, we're doing a live pod in the city here for a few people with our friend Juliana Salazar, which will be fun. And we'll talk to you on Friday with our boy, Shad, live in person. I might have to get a pint for that one. With the goat. All right. We'll see you guys later. Thank you for listening. Bye. Athletic Brewing Company crafts award-winning non-alcoholic beers for those who want to be part of every round.

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